Adventures in Writing: Accidental Homework Assignment

This post comes to you today due to my Twitter Tribe – so many amazing people coming together to support and bolster each other in times of need. Today, we have challenged ourselves to a homework assignment.

I’m mostly writing a post so that all the details are in one place (for me, because I’m absentminded more often than not) and for those who possibly missed something due to real life projects. Totally by accident, we have a homework assignment due Friday Nightish (due to timezone differences) that has to be 1500 words (minimum it turns out).

Also, this keychain must be involved. I know, you love the mini flogger and fuzzy balls. Admit it. Anyway, Dr. J. asked what it invoked and it became an entire thing and now there’s a homework assignment (technically, that means it’s her fault, right?) Anyway. This keychain is central to the story along with a key, of course – what’s a keychain without a key?

So far we’ve mentioned a professor (please do not use any descriptions of real persons, dead, undead, alive, in the story – yes I’m being silly, but things have changed!! No really, no real peoples please!), a student, a lecture hall, a coffee shop, pumpkin spice, hot cocoa, and a maintenance person or janitor. It’s going to be comedic and absurd in an Austin Powers sort of way, but with actual sex. So far in this amazing heroic feat with lots of sexy comedy is: Dr. J., Professor Sex, John Benson, Gio the Arrogant, Nicci Haydon, PhAfterDark, and myself. These stories will not be available outside of email (unless changed to protect identities that may or may not have been utilized). There’s also no working together (no cheating) and no sharing. I’ve already got my title, folks and I can’t wait to dig in!

PS: This is why having a group of people who support, respect, and love you is important. They don’t have to write in the same genre as you either, but hopefully they’ll offer help, ideas, talk about plot bunnies and twisty ideas with you. They’ll hold your hand, physically or virtually, when things go sideways. They’ll laugh and cry with tears of joy when you get the best news ever.

A Penny for your Thoughts: Emotionally Trapped

There is so much hate and pain in this world. I’m waiting for the haunted painting and the slime to start rising from below the streets like in Ghostbusters II.

Just a Quick Warning: Not writing related, not a hot story, just me letting it out about all the violence in the world.

First, no one should ever feel the fear of ‘Will I be killed today?’ at any point in their life. Obviously, police officers, security professionals, and military are always wondering if they’ll be shot today (or worse), but think about it, if we could have armed military and security forces that never have to think that, the world would be a much better place.

Yes, I do feel we will always need people who work in some form of security. Even if the world becomes utopia – there will always be people that need to be trained. It would be great if we never needed it, but … humans are flawed.

Second, the pain and grief that I feel for people who just want to go out into the world and live their life, have a fun night, or get an education, that find themselves in these horrific situations is immense. It makes me wonder why we don’t bring back public executions and so forth. I know, grisly, nasty, violent (just another way to spread what we’re trying to stop). Just because these people have been labeled ‘mentally ill’ does not make them so. I know people who have mental illness and they claim it. They do whatever they can to manage their life. Usually, those who can’t take it, take their own lives, without going out and shooting or stabbing or running people over with a vehicle. (Yes, I’ve personally known people to take their own lives. It’s just as emotionally draining and shocking, but my main point is that they didn’t take a bunch of people with them first.)

I feel trapped.

Every time I turn on the tv, there is something else about the latest massacre in Las Vegas. You have no idea how blessed I feel that my friend, who I may not chat with often, is here in Ohio instead of still living in Las Vegas. It’s not just there, though. Local events, less than an hour drive from where I am, hell right by where my daughter went to college a few short months ago, have shooting (and other violent) atrocities. I know of people who have told me they’ve called the cops because of someone they didn’t know being on their porch and the cops were like “What do you want us to do about it?” Uhm, fucking drive by maybe? Find out what the fuck someone I DON’T KNOW is doing on my property? (Especially when living in a sketchy area known for drug use, drug overdose, and violence.)

We never know if something like this is going to happen. We’re encouraged to go on with our lives when they do. Those of us who don’t have people who were harmed or killed during these events have no idea of what those who do are going through – unless you’ve been through it previously. The simple fact that we continue to experience these atrocities has me baffled.

Upon arriving home, I close my garage door. When I get out of my vehicle, I lock it. When I get inside the house, I lock the door behind me. I do open my curtains and I don’t have blinds in the living room windows, because I enjoy having sunshine fill the living room or kitchen. I live in a fairly safe area where the cops patrol and we have a neighborhood watch. The windows are all locked. The only time they are unlocked and open is when I am home all day. I even open the front door on the really nice days – which are almost gone. It doesn’t mean that I don’t have a few moments of anxiety when I see the same vehicle drive down my road several times. They’re usually lost and it’s a given due to how the roads are around here. It doesn’t mean I don’t panic a little when I see someone I don’t know walking to my door. One day I’ll finally give in and get a no solicitation sticker.

Perhaps we need to go back to the simple rule of life: Do unto others as you would have done unto you doesn’t work here for one reason – because if given the chance, they are doing it to themselves. They are shooting themselves – or able to commit suicide by cop. No trial, no jail, no execution. Perhaps we need to go to the more ethical version of “An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will”

Yes, that’s the (end of the) Wiccan Rede. Now, I don’t identify as religious, but if I did, I’d be more Wiccan or Taoist or Buddhist than anything else. Just because someone BELIEVES differently than you do, LIVES differently than you do, CHOOSES differently than you do, does not give you the right to commit violence upon them.


By the way, I tend to have a very violent mind. Yes, I do want to hurt people. Some days I have to remind myself I look horrible in orange. But what makes me different is that I don’t follow-through. I play video games when I’m feeling particularly vicious so that I can work out the aggression. I write until I can’t move my fingers any longer – usually stuff that’s worthless because it’s just me cleaning out my violent urges. No one taught me to do these things, I had to learn them on my own. Playing violent video games doesn’t make me want to go out and hurt people – it helps release the tension and stress that I feel.

The only one you have the right to commit violence upon, is yourself. I’m tired of turning on the tv and seeing another mass shooting, another terrorist bombing, another act of violence so that another evil person or group can get their name(s) spread across the globe in nanoseconds.

It makes you wonder why we don’t have a tv channel that just shows kittens. Oh wait, it’s not on tv, but we do have that on the internet. Or puppies. Or meerkats. It just feels that with more and more focus on these violent events – because we have to warn the people – is never ending. What on earth do we have to do in order to find and feel peace not only within ourselves but around us as well? What are we missing that we can’t find equality? Where is our compassion for one another? How will we ever get there if we can’t see past greed and jealousy and hate?

If you are feeling out of sorts – even if you think you’re fine – make a phone call to someone who can listen. If you don’t feel you have someone that will truly be of help, then call a hotline.

Always Keep Fighting. Love Yourself First. Click To Tweet

Remember that taking time for yourself is not taking time away from others. It’s simply a way for you to recharge yourself in order to continue being part of your family, workplace, and community. Saying “NO” is not a bad thing and should never require an explanation. Practice saying it in the mirror. “Sorry, but I’m unable to commit.” (Let me check my schedule and get back to you means they just might nag you until you cry and give in.) “Apologies, but I have a prior commitment.” (No, they do not need specifics. Even if your commitment is to a bubble bath, glass of wine, and an audio book – it is still a commitment.)

Masturbation Monday: Audio Porn


Listening to your lover can be one of the hottest things ever. But what if your lover wasn’t in the room while you were listening?

Almost scraping the side of my beloved Maserati, I hit the brakes. Being late was the worst thing ever for me and tonight was date night! He was on tonight and it was supposed to be live. I hoped to all hell the conversation / interview in the beginning would run a little long.

Grabbing all of my crap from the passenger side, I hopped out of the vehicle and headed for the locked door. It only took me twice to unlock the damn door, but I shoved my way in, slamming it tight behind me, then flipping the lock. I made it up the handful of steps and officially into the house, then dropped everything right there. I headed for the bedroom, kicking off my heels and opening the app at the same time. Multi-tasking was a specialty.

Tossing the phone on the bed, I stripped, throwing clothes into the hamper. I breathed a sigh of relief when I heard two people speaking conversationally. I had made it. They were chatting about what he would be reading. Skin of my teeth.

My favorite toy was never far away and within moments I was snuggled comfortable on the bed, pillows in just the right places, when the narrator started speaking. His voice thrilled me to my toes. Husky, warm, tingling all those nerves in a way that no other man was able to. And then he started reading.

Taking a few more moments, I plugged in my best headset and felt as though he was only speaking for my pleasure. I moaned in absolute need as he started out the story, slow and teasing. I never missed an episode. Any novel he narrated was on my phone for the time between episodes of new readings. I had my favorites downloaded and backed up.

Many lonely nights were soothed by his smooth-spoken words, tantalizing temptations as they brought me to completion. It wouldn’t be any different tonight. It never took him long to get to the sexy bits of the story and this one heated me up fast. When the woman in the story was being spanked, I spanked myself. When her nipples were being sucked, I licked my fingers and did my best to simulate it. I touched myself, following the details of the story, as best I could.

When it came time, I turned on the toy and teased myself even more. Vibrations against my nipples, along my collarbone, ribs, and working my way down to my mound. Taking every word in, letting them ripple over my being, I got myself hotter than the sun.

As I slid the toy up inside, then out and over my clit, following a specific pattern to keep me on the edge, he said the magic words. “Come for me, baby. Come now.” And I came. My entire body shuddered in pleasure and I was swept away on a tide of pleasure. Panting, I hit the power button to turn off the toy. I tore off the headphones. That was all I needed to hear. I’d listen to the after thoughts later.

I looked up when I smelled the clean scent of my sweet man standing over me, naked and ready. “Was it all you needed love?” I couldn’t take my eyes off his hand as he stroked himself slow and steady.

“I thought it was live?” My voice was raspy, so I repeated myself in case he didn’t hear me.

“It was, but with a good head start just in case there were any tech issues. I’ve been watching you for about five minutes now.” That voice, his voice. I needed nothing more to make me melt into a puddle. I reached for him.

“Why are you just standing there? Get me off. Again.” He needed no other push to join me in our bed and as he pressed kisses along my skin and stroked me with firm fingers, he told me everything he was going to do to me in that warm, husky voice.

You can find more delicious and naughty stories over at Masturbation Monday hosted by the lovely Kayla Lords. If you haven’t submitted your own story as well, and write romance, erotica, or some combination of the genres and sub-genres, please consider doing so.

Link: Masturbation Monday

Link: Kayla Lords

A Penny for your Thoughts: Sex and Sunshine

When it comes to sex, even today, we are having to fight to bring it out of the darkness. Schools teach – if anything at all – abstinence and disease and the mechanics. They don’t bother to teach you about consent – because you shouldn’t be having sex anyway, right?

Growing up, we didn’t talk about sex at all. Which is a horrible thing because horrible things can happen to young people. I grew up when people knew their neighbors, got together with them, helped each other out. Not all neighbors are good people, by the way. You learn the hard way and everyone suffers as a result.

About the age of 9 I found Playboy magazines – a box full of them – in a closet. I have a curious mind, so of course I paged through them. I skimmed the articles. It didn’t affect me negatively. I didn’t go out and do naughty things. I was nine for fuck’s sake. I was also the quiet, weird girl everyone thought was shy. But no, I was just living in my imagination more than reality. It was much more entertaining to me. I felt welcome there more than anywhere.

My parents never talked about sex. I decided not to go that route with my own daughter. I answered her questions with age-appropriate information. I remember her asking me why guys like blowjobs when she was a new teenager. I think I answered in the terms of warm, wet, sucking action on a sensitive organ. And then I also explained that guys will ask for blowjobs and not reciprocate… because, well, it’s true more often than not, even in this day and age of sex-positivity.

Sex is a personal journey and experience. It’s high time we embrace it instead of shoving it into the dark. I honestly think if there were less shame in having sex we’d have less celebrities and politicians having to apologize for their sexual acts (and no, I don’t mean those that include minors). There’s no shortage of celebrities having to admit to being addicted to sex – and to be honest, it’s getting old. Actually, it was getting old ten years ago, now it’s just ridiculous.

Sex is a part of almost every person’s life. We should be teaching people about the pleasure of sex, how to protect themselves when having sex, and proper consent to sex. It shouldn’t be shamed or hidden behind locked doors. Well, you know what I mean. Obviously, I don’t want to see my neighbors out having sex on my front lawn or anything, but I just think if they decided to bring in a third or a fourth or a string of lovers to their bed we shouldn’t shame them for it.

It’s also high time we keep our noses out of other people’s sex lives. Celebrities, politicians, and athletes have every right to their own private lives instead of being put under a microscope looking for naughty scandal. Just because some believe one way and others believe another is no reason for us to constantly battle about the right way to live. You wouldn’t force someone who’s allergic to a type of food to eat it, right? Forcing beliefs on others just because you think it’s the right moral way is no way to live a happy, full life. It’s a great way to make you, and others, miserable.

And before I get more preachy… Sex should be enjoyed between consenting people for pleasurable reasons, however they may want it to be whether it’s vanilla missionary with the lights off or with a group of lovers watching each other get off. Perhaps if we stopped shoving sex and sexual urges into a deep dark closet it would be less of a shock that people actually have it.

Enjoy your sex life, however you want. Teach your children to respect their own bodies and the bodies of others. Teach them that sex can be fun and funny and consent is sexy.

Interviewed by Oleander Plume

In case you missed it, awhile back I was interviewed by the intoxicating Oleander Plume – goddess of the Horatio Slice Universe – currently known as “O. Plumey” when you see her pop up on Twitter. 

Welcome to another episode of “Super Heroes of Smut”! This week, I have the red-headed ball of awesome known as Mischa Eliot in the hot seat, discussing all things smutty. Before we get started, let’s learn a little about Mischa:

Obligatory Bio for Oleander: That’s right, Oleander made me write this for her. She’s a slave driver, I swear. Anyway. I’m Mischa Eliot and I write smutty stories. I like to play in the BDSM realm and I enjoy dragging out my stories to give you the most scintillating smutty goodness I can offer. My cat, Peanut, enjoys preventing me from writing by latching onto my right arm, with claws. Please send help. During the rest of the day, I’m an office superhero. I should wear a freaking cape, but I’m pretty sure that’s against office dress code. I know, ridiculous. I live in Northeast Ohio and I’m constantly begging or searching for sunshine.

Oleander Plume: You rascal!! shuffles papers This is a serious interview. Let’s get serious. uncontrollable laughter How long have you been writing (erotica or other wise)?

You can read the whole thing here!

And, while you’re at it – pick up your very own copy of Horatio Slice (free pimping by me because I fucking love this book).

Masturbation Monday: Scent-sations

Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words – and sometimes it spawns over 1200. Enjoy this naughty story and make sure to click the link below to read more from other incredibly talented authors.

I shoved my face into his pillow and breathed deep, which was stupid because then I ended up sneezing a ridiculous amount of times from the goose feathers. I hated goose down. How the fuck did he use this pillow comfortably? I ripped the pillow case off and tossed his pillow away. Grabbing my own pillow, I continued to smell shampoo and his unique musk from the cotton fabric.

Mason wasn’t even going to be gone for long. He’d been called in to work for an emergency meeting. Someone had broken a leg and he had to be brought up to speed for the upcoming event. Mason had to take their place. I writhed against the sheets, mixing my own scent with his. I loved sleeping naked.

Squeezing my boob, I snapped a pic – without my face, of course – and sent it to his phone. I hoped he had it in his front pocket on vibrate. In fact, I knew it was there. Technically, he wasn’t allowed to have his phone in meetings, but if he kept it in his pocket, then no one said anything. I stuck my tongue out as if I were trying to reach my nipple, then snapped another pic. After cropping it, I sent it.

Our plan had been to stay in bed and fuck the day away. Slow, fast, soft, hard – writhing against each other until we couldn’t move any longer. And then doing it some more after we caught our breath and our hearts resumed normal rhythm. Obviously, we’d take breaks to eat, and I knew we’d have to have coffee. I had planned to suck his cock while he was flipping pancakes or scrambling eggs, or burning waffles.

I bit my lower lip and snapped a pic, cropping it below my eyes, I sent it.

I could imagine him knowing it was me, wondering if I was okay. Hoping it wasn’t urgent. Knowing that since I hadn’t called frantically, that it was just me texting him random shit. Except he wouldn’t know that I’d broken my no naked photos rule until he was able to look at his phone. Positioning my legs just so, covering myself with my free hand, one finger pressed between wet lips, I snapped another pic. This one I decided to change things up. I turned it black and white and stuck a silly mustache sticker where my finger disappeared, then clicked send.

Just as I was thinking of what crazy thing I could do next, the bedroom door burst open and I almost screamed my hair white. Shockingly, I didn’t fall off the damn bed. I was so close to the edge, but I hung on like the kitten in those posters and regained my balance.

Panting, I glared at Mason. “What in the fuck, Mason!” I threw the empty pillow case at his face and then shifted so I was on my knees, boobs swaying as I resettled on the bed. “You almost scared me to death. I could’ve DIED just now! What if I had fallen off the bed and hit my damn head?”

“It’s your fault.” Mason stripped off his tie and then started unbuttoning his shirt. I hadn’t noticed until then the bulge in his pants. “You kept texting me during the meeting, so I asked to be excused to use the restroom. I thought you were dying and then I saw the damn photos. I was SURE you’d hit your head. I told them I had to come home, something was wrong with my wife. I have to go back tomorrow so I can be ready for this show next week.”

Mason’s face was red, but not because he was mad. He was embarrassed. I had broken my rule. MY rule. The rule I told him would never ever be broken. We were never to send each other naked pics, but what could I do other than break that stupid rule? We were supposed to be spending the day in bed fucking each other. Just thinking about it all week had left me horny and then he had to go into work.

“I’m not sorry! We were supposed to be here fucking each other and feasting on chocolate covered strawberries and drinking mimosas or some weird kind of honeymoon stuff that people do when they get married. You promised we would have today. You broke your promise, at no fault to you, so I broke my rule. I think we’re even.” I crossed my arms, he unzipped his pants.

“Suck my fucking cock. Now.” Mason pushed his pants to his ankles and pointed at his purple-headed one-eyed snake. He tried his damnedest to look mad, to look mean. Too bad for him, and so good for me, his baby face couldn’t do either. I burst out laughing.

“Make me.” Hands on hips, the ‘I Dare You’ look on my face, knees slightly spread apart as I hoped to hell I wouldn’t accidentally bounce myself off the bed. It had happened a few times before, always resulting in some kind of weird bruise.

Mason grabbed my tits and squeezed, making my eyes roll back into my head.

“Oh, fuck baby, that’s what I need right now.” I put my hands over his, making him mash my boobs together. In a few seconds, he was on his knees on the bed in front of me, pants still hanging around his ankles, tie and shirt undone. Sexy as hell.

Leaning over, he nibbled and nuzzled along my neck. When he got to my ear, he squeezed one breast harder, “I said, suck my fucking cock now.” He slid a hand up into my hair and then pulled down towards his cock.

I couldn’t resist, but I didn’t want the game to end just yet. “I didn’t hear the magic word,” came out all sing-song, followed up by snickering. Placing my hands on each side of his legs gave me just enough leverage to keep him from forcing me down further, unless he wanted to hurt me. Mason wouldn’t hurt a fly. Hell, I knew he didn’t kill the spiders I sent him after but took them outside. Just being this dominant with me was probably giving him heart palpitations. Not only were Mason’s hands a little damp, his breathing was erratic.

“Slut of mine, I demand a damn good cock-sucking for your naughty behavior.” I tilted my head to the side, of course thanks to him allowing me since my hair was still wrapped tightly around his hand.

“As you wish, husband.” When our eyes met, I saw the desire burning in his eyes. Desire for me. Opening up wide, I licked and swirled, teased and nibbled. I played with his balls and tickled his taint. I squeezed his ass cheeks together like we had my tits and then pulled them apart all while bobbing up and down on his delectable dick.

I knew what kind of porn he enjoyed watching, so I gave it to him like a porn star. I slurped and moaned and listened to his cries of ecstasy above me. When I knew he was about to shoot, I pulled myself off and jerked his rod in my hot hands until he covered my face and tits with streaks of sticky sperm.

Mason collapsed on the bed, his pants trailing off. He hadn’t even taken off his shoes. I’d have to spank him for that one later. He broke his own rule: no shoes in the main house. Such a bad boy, such a great husband.

You can find more delicious and naughty stories over at Masturbation Monday hosted by the lovely Kayla Lords. If you haven’t submitted your own story as well, and write romance, erotica, or some combination of the genres and sub-genres, please consider doing so.

Link: Masturbation Monday

Link: Kayla Lords

Out Now: Possession

Just because you finish a series, doesn’t always mean the series is over. Sometimes there’s always more to a story.

And that’s what has happened. The Supervisor Sexcapades Saga had another line running through it about the club owned by Breanna and financially supported by Quinn. Possession is a BDSM-Lifestyle club that offers more than just a place to tie someone up and spank them. It offers an introduction to the lifestyle as well. Training and a safe haven for those into kinky fun.

Possession will be an exclusive for Radish Fiction as an ongoing serial that follows Kendrick. A college athlete, injured and operated on. He’s lost his athletic scholarship and is unable to do his part-time construction job. Looking through the classifieds, he finds an ad for a bartender paying twice what he’s currently making. It would help him stay in college, so he takes a chance and applies.

Todd, a buddy of his, tells him that Possession is a sex club. When Kendrick doesn’t believe him, he shows a little video someone else sent to him. It still doesn’t give any indication, other than a woman being spanked, what he’s getting himself into. Kendrick goes forth anyway, and accepts the position.

And, even though I wrote the Supervisor Sexcapades Saga in third person, Possession will be written in first. You’ll have a front row seat to experience what each character is feeling and enjoying. Breanna, Maryann, and other familiar faces will make appearances along with new faces and fetishes. If you’re looking for a new adventure in BDSM, then Possession just might have what you’re looking for.

You can download the Radish Fiction app free from Google Play or the App Store for your phone or tablet. If you want to read the stories I have up – some from here on the blog, others that have already been published elsewhere, please do! You can find me by searching for MischaEliot – no spaces.

Possession is now available on Radish! New Episode Every Thursday

Adventures in Writing: Negative Influences

So, I sort of missed Masturbation Monday this week, but that’s okay! It’s been stressful because I’m doing two jobs, sometimes three, at once and something had to give. 

Since I am going through an extra busy week, I thought I would chat about negative influences and how to use them in a positive way with your story writing. If there is one thing I have learned over the years, people love to be miserable. I cannot figure out why, though. It completely befuddles me. They also love to do their best to drag you into their misery and hold you hostage until you’re just as down and out as they are. 

I do my best to be a good influence to everyone. Dr. J., Oleander Plume, and I, among others in the #TwitterTribe are constantly helping one another to find the silver lining in our dark clouds. I have allowed myself to wallow in misery and let me tell you, it’s so much easier to get out of when you give yourself permission to 1. wallow in misery and 2. allow others to pull you out of it. 

When one of us is going through this, the first thing I say is ‘Remember how you are feeling RIGHT NOW, this moment, in this misery or pain or emotional upheaval’. Why do I want people to remember? Because you can use it in your story. You can write it out, pour your emotions into a character, and people will feel what you felt, what your character felt, when they read those words. They may even reach for a box of tissues and if you can get them to do that, you know you’ve hit the honey pot. 

Use the negative things people say and do around you. Give those traits to a character. They don’t even have to be the villain or antagonist of the story. There’s always one person who’s negative in your life – and if you say ‘no there isn’t’, well, I’m sorry to say, it might be you. 

I tell people I try to be good. That’s all I want in life. I want to be good. I want to do good things. I want to help people get their dreams realized. I want to pump them up and pimp out what they create from being uplifted and feeling like they can do anything.  

Are you feeling down and out like you’re being swallowed up by the darkest clouds imaginable? Write it out. Paint it. Sculpt. Do something to remove those negative thoughts outside of your mind. Use them to your advantage. Did someone say something to you that put you in that mood? Did you absorb someone else’s emotional madness and are caught in their sticky web of sorrow? Even if you end up not using what you create from these emotions, putting them to good use will help you remove them. 

You can rephrase the backhanded compliment someone said to you in a story to create conflict and emotional attachment with your readers. While I prefer lighthearted, adventurous, everyone gets happy stories lately, you’ve got to have something for those characters to fight for, to yearn for – because otherwise, it may not grab your reader by the collar and hold them there. 

I consider lots of my stories and characters to be fluffy because they tend to get what they want. Especially when I’m writing shorts here on the blog. However, they do have emotions and backgrounds. They do have thoughts and desires. So, while they aren’t all fluffy, they are full of fluff. It’s difficult to write complicated characters when writing short, but it can be done. Don’t sell yourself short.  

What is happening to you today? This week? This month? This year? Have you been documenting the feelings and events of your life? You should. They say ‘write what you know’ and we all know how we are feeling more often than not. Grab those feelings and shove them into a box, keep them ready to be used to bring your readers to tears from either pain or joy, to make them laugh out loud so people give them the side-eye on the subway. 

What are you working on that will make me feel for your characters today? 


Reviewed: Consensually Speaking with Gio

Okay, first, let me say why I’m writing a review here on the blog. I dislike Apple and I will never ever download iTunes again. The only time I downloaded it was the best reason ever – The Librarians pilot episode had extended scenes and the first one was free. I couldn’t say no. 

On to the podcast. If you don’t follow me on Twitter (you really should, I’m a hoot along with my #CoffeeCrew and #TwitterTribe), this guy (Gio) started a podcast. He was looking for people to come onto the podcast and chat about kinky fuckery. We chatted in direct messages and I found him to be non-creepy and quite fun to chat with – therefore, he gets good marks just for that.

So, I pimped out his podcast. In fact, I did a pretty good job, because my amazing #SisterInSmut Oleander Plume scheduled a chat with him. This excited me. Then, I get messages on Twitter again from Gio that made me laugh out loud – and if it makes me actually laugh out loud, then even more good marks. He wanted to know why I would spread word far and wide about his podcast but not make a date to chat myself.

And so I did. And not just me, either. Professor Sex has been in the hot seat and Dr. J. when life returns to non-hurricane madness will be making an appointment. AND, there may be an episode where Oleander, Dr. J. and I are all on together. At once. Yes, you should feel for Gio, he has no idea what he’s getting himself into there.

I had a lot of fun and so will you. If you aren’t sure, listen to what he has published out there now. You’ll enjoy learning about him and the people he’s chatting with about how they got into bdsm and their take on the lifestyle, various levels of kink and more.

I don’t know when the episode goes live but, yes, I chatted with Gio on the podcast – lil ole me. Talking about KINKY FUCKERY and writing and twitter and writer friends. And I have no idea what else. Try the podcast out, then make your date with Gio, he’s worth it. FIVE STARS if you need an actual rating.

So, if you are an author, a sex blogger, into the kinky bdsm lifestyle, and just want to say “HEY, this is me and my kinky life and why I am a kinky fucker” please follow Gio on twitter. He’s a great guy, he’s fun to chat with, and you might even get to take the “How Kinky are You?” quiz.


Podcast on iTunes | Twitter

(And you’ll get the really cool badge I somehow instigated him into making… Yep, that was me. I did it.)

A Penny for Your Thoughts: Reviewing Books

I know I don’t write the best reviews when it comes to reviewing period, but there are some things I look for specifically when I read them. Here’s a rundown!

I will actually start with the lowest ratings. I want to know what annoyed readers about a book. Is there a specific reason they didn’t care for it or are they just being a troll? I’ll look for things about the characters themselves and the writing as well. I can handle it if the grammar isn’t perfect (mine is nowhere near) but if the heroine or hero are unlikable, then I won’t bother reading.

If I want to read something that has a ton of conflict or emotional strife, I’ll read something dystopian. I’ve read both the Hunger Games and the Divergent series. I’ve also seen the movies. I enjoyed both (so far). In fact, I think you should read the Hunger Games books before seeing the movies because you have a ton of insight the movies aren’t able to offer – such as what’s going through Katniss’ mind while she’s wandering the woods in the dome.

I get that new lovers are going to have issues finding balance – but if the hero is an absolute dick and treats everyone like shit – and has less emotional quotient than Walter O’Brien from Scorpion – then I highly doubt they are going to be interested in a simpering heroine who is unable to function properly without someone yanking her puppet strings.

After reading the lowest ranking reviews, I go to the top ranking reviews and find out what they have to say. Did they just LOVE LOVE LOVE the book? Why did they love it? Are they in absolute contradiction from the low-rated reviews? Do they list specific reasons why they love the hero, the heroine, and which parts made them squeal in delight? Do they list the parts that they could’ve done without? This is a big thing with me, if there is something you dislike about a book, I want to know because that helps me both as a reader AND as a writer. I know I can’t please everyone – and I certainly don’t aim for those standards – but it’s still insightful information.

I also look to see if the person is a verified sale or if they received an advanced reader’s copy. You have to state it if you received an ARC on Amazon.. There are books that I have received an ARC for that I’ve also bought because that is how much I loved the title. Does the person posting the review have a website specifically for reviewing books? I look for this because then there might be more to the review on their website than on GoodReads or Amazon.

If nothing has put me off via the reviews, then I go to the Look Inside to see what the author has to offer in the first 10% of the book. Did you know there are authors who will put a snippet of a sexy scene in the first 10% to get you tempted to buy the book? If not, they do when you’re buying erotica. I keep scrolling and find out what kind of action the book starts out with and which POV they are in. If I’m psyched from the first 10% then I will most-likely do a 1-click gimme that now.

I enjoy character-driven stories. I like consequences for actions. I like adventure. I absolutely need more humor in my life. Make me laugh, make me hold my sides because they ache. Make me fall in love with these characters. I get that there are people out there who seem to go for the ‘bad boy’ who’s a real dick, and to each their own, but they aren’t welcome in my Kindle any longer. I’m tired of the assholes, the guys who are technically raping the woman because she’s told them to leave several times, has said the word no several times. In my world – no means no. No doesn’t mean maybe, No doesn’t mean yes. No doesn’t mean I’ll think about it. No means no. There are also differences between No, don’t stop! and No. Don’t. Stop. I see a lot more of the latter than the former these days.

Are you looking to join a Kinky Book Club? Check out Loving BDSM – they have what you’re looking for!

How do you judge a book by a review? Do you have an exhausting process to go through? Have you been burned by reviews before? I have, that’s why I read the lowest ratings – they’re the ones who will mention if the guy is a dick or rapist. They are the ones that will complain the loudest, the longest, without being a troll.


Masturbation Monday: Traffic Jam – Part Two

Sometimes when you think you have privacy, you don’t. Someone might be watching and enjoying everything that you’re doing.

“I’m bored.” I craned my neck looking at the line of traffic before and after us. Everyone, stopped, most people had put their vehicles in park. Some had even shut them off. Being stuck on the highway could be bad, especially if you forgot to fill your gas tank. Luckily, I didn’t have to worry about any of that.

“Relax, sweetheart, we’ll be there soon enough.” Eddie patted me on my bare knee. The dress I wore was flirty and swayed when I turned quickly. I loved the little pleats in it and the pattern of flowers on the white fabric. His fingers lingered a little longer than normal.

I couldn’t help myself and I squirmed in my seat. “But I’m bored out of my mind.” I whined and tried to get comfortable. The giant SUV had amazing seats, but not when you were stuck in traffic. Eddie’s hand ended up further along my thigh. He squeezed hard enough to get my attention, but not enough to hurt.

“Calm down now or I’ll spank you right here and now.” The firmness in his voice settled me. But not for long. I kept playing with the window button. Up and down. Up and down. I checked out the guy in the car next to us.

“He’s kind of hot. Do you think he’d like to watch if you spanked me?” The giggle escaped and Eddie loosened his belt, then leaned over as far as he could to glance at the guy. “Hey, easy there. You’re such a big brute!”

Eddie squished me into my seat, his shoulder grinding against my breast in a very pleasant way. My nipples peaked and I shuddered at the lust he’d incited inside me. There was no way in hell I was going to be able to stay still now. “Daddy… I need you. Right now.”

“Nope, not happening.” I watched him move back into his seat and fiddle with the radio. He’d turned on the traffic station, but they weren’t reporting anything new. Channel surfing made me even more fidgety. I looked out the window again, pouting.

“Baby, please don’t be upset. We’re in the middle of a traffic jam. They could have this cleaned up any second and the last thing we need is a cop coming to knock on the window to find us playing around.” Eddie pouted back at me, giving me puppy eyes, blinking those stormy grey eyes at me. I couldn’t resist. I melted.

“If we don’t get moving soon, this seat is going to need detailed. I’m so wet right now for you, Daddy.” I crooned at him. I made kissy faces at him. I ran my hands down the top of my dress, pulling it to give him a peek at the bra I was wearing underneath – his favorite.

“Oh damn, baby girl, you get me so hot.” Eddie fumbled in between his legs, getting himself resituated. Then he looked in the car on his other side. “This chick over here is eating her lunch. I don’t think we’ll be moving as soon as I thought.”

“Not yet, baby. Wait for him. I want you to come when he comes.”

“Oh. My. God.” I leaned out my window so far, Eddie grabbed my clothing. I don’t know what he was thinking. I wasn’t going to fall out or anything. I mean, damn, I had the seatbelt on.

“What’s going on, baby?” He leaned over behind me, but I was taking up as much space in the window as possible.

“This guy over here is whacking off. Like, seriously, he’s yanking his junk right now.” I licked my lips. “Daddy, I want to taste him. Can I invite him over here with us?”

“No baby girl, you cannot invite him here with us.” Eddie slid fingers along my thigh, then under my skirt. “You’re not wearing the panties I told you to wear.”

I wiggled against his fingers. “They’re in my purse. I was going to put them on when we got there.” Eddie’s fingers slid along my crack while I watched the guy in the car next to us stroke his meat to whatever he was listening to. I could see his lips moving, probably mouthing the lyrics of the song I couldn’t quite hear.

“Daddy, please.” Eddie continued sliding his fingers along a pre-determined path. I bit my lip and moaned. I grabbed the door and rocked against his hand, willing him to at least fingerbang me. And then it happened, his fingers slid inside and heat suffused me.

“Yes, that’s it Daddy. Keep rocking with me while the boy in that car wanks off.” A long, low moan tried to escape, but I clamped my lips tight against it. I probably sounded like a cat in heat to anyone that could hear us. I didn’t care. It didn’t matter. I needed this.

“Can I come, Daddy?” Eddie nipped the back of my neck, he was right with me now, looking over my shoulder at the man in the next car, watching him as he stroked himself.

“Not yet baby.” Eddie reached around and squeezed my breast, making sure to pinch the nipple hard. When he breathed, his hot breath coated the back of my neck, causing shivers in other now chilly areas. I could hear the sounds his fingers made as I rode him, harder and faster, in time with the boy in the next lane.

“Now, Daddy?” Eddie was breathing hard, his hair stirring my styled hair. Lips grazed my neck and then his tongue.

“Not yet, baby. Wait for him. I want you to come when he comes.” He moved his hand from my breast and feeling rushed back into my nipple, only to glide down the front of me and under my skirt to pinch my clit. It wasn’t as hard as my nipple, but it caused me to cry out.

“You see him, baby? He’s about to come. He’s about to spurt all over.” The young man was searching for something, and then found it. A napkin. “Are you ready baby? Come for me.”

As the young man writhed against his seat in what he believed to be the privacy of his own vehicle, I came hard on my Daddy’s strong, long fingers. I held onto the door, knuckles white from the strain as I clamped my lips closed to keep from screaming out my pleasure.

I rested my head against the door for a moment, but Eddie, after licking his fingers clean, pulled me back into my seat and hit his button to roll my window back up.

“Oh Daddy, that was fanfuckingtastic. Can we do that again sometime?” I sat boneless in my seat, a dreamy state fogging my brain.

“Traffic is moving. Maybe we can do it again sometime. I’ll give you five minutes to recover and then you’re going to suck my cock like a good little slut for Daddy.”

“Yes, Daddy.”

You can find more delicious naughty stories over at Masturbation Monday hosted by the lovely Kayla Lords. If you haven’t submitted your own story as well, and write romance, erotica, or some combination of the genres and sub-genres, please consider doing so.

Link: Masturbation Monday

Link: Kayla Lords

Masturbation Monday: Traffic Jam

Sometimes when you’re stuck and unable to move forward, you just need to sit back, crank up the tunes, and have a wank. Despite who might be peeking or how public the area.

Tired of the impatient drivers honking, I cranked up the volume. The woman singing had a sexy voice and the lyrics… well the lyrics with her voice got me worked up. From what I’d heard on the radio, there had been a bad accident. The cops and crews were trying to get everything cleaned up, but were having a difficult time diverting traffic. My commute just extended itself to a ridiculous amount of time.

The song I loved the most came on and I shifted in my seat. My pants were becoming quite uncomfortable. Adjusting myself wasn’t working, but I didn’t want to turn the music off either. I slid the car in park, then slid my seat back one notch. Glancing around, I noticed the giant SUV next to me, the windows tinted illegally dark. On the other side, the driver was yakking away on her phone.

In a way, I was alone. It was a beautiful day, other than the black smoke billowing up ahead. I closed the windows and turned the a/c down a couple of degrees. My windows were nowhere near as dark as the SUV, but I thought a little privacy was needed.

Closing my eyes, I let the golden voice through the speakers take me along with her. I ran my hands over my shirt, flicking my nipples with my thumbs. A jolt ran through my cock and I swallowed hard. Am I really going to do this in the middle of a traffic jam?

I licked my lips, then unsnapped my jeans. Pushing them open and down slightly, I groped myself beneath the thin fabric of my boxers. Just the thought of this woman touching me, whispering in my ear the naughty lyrics she was singing, drove me deeper into lust. Sliding up my shirt, I pinched my nipple with the beat, light, then hard, then harder.

My cock nearly exploded as I rolled my balls in my hand. “Yeah, baby, keep crooning those naughty thoughts.” I finally gave in to my need and pulled my cock out of my boxers. As I stroked, jizz leaked out, dribbling down. I used it as lubricant since I didn’t have any with me. Keeping my hand loose enough to slide through easily, but tight enough to have friction kept me on edge.

It felt like the vibrations of the song rippled through every nerve and caused little electric sparks along my spine, settling in my balls. I started to ache, needing to come. I tightened my hold and sped my pace up a little faster. Swallowing hard, I opened my eyes, realizing I had nothing to sop up the sticky mess I was about to make.

I spied napkins in the cup holder on my door and grabbed them just as a white jet of spunk erupted. I caught it and covered the head of my cock with the napkin as I continued wanking. When I finished, I leaned my head against the window and looked up just as the window of the SUV rolled back up, the tint hiding the person who had just caught me whacking off in traffic.

Check out who was spying on our naughty driver!

You can find more delicious naughty stories over at Masturbation Monday hosted by the lovely Kayla Lords. If you haven’t submitted your own story as well, and write romance, erotica, or some combination of the genres and sub-genres, please consider doing so.

Link: Masturbation Monday

Link: Kayla Lords

A Penny for Your Thoughts: Sharing from Your Kindle

We’re all very busy people! Who has time to write reviews? (Please keep writing reviews, I’m being a wee bit sarcastic here!)

There’s a feature I stumbled upon accidentally when I highlighted some text. I knew about highlighting previously – for like reference and to copy and search, or maybe get a definition for a word. However, I had never before seen the Share option! It’s probably been there for awhile. Hell, they probably put an email out that I deleted about the feature – who knows. I didn’t know it was there.

Anyway, you can highlight some text, say a favorite quote from a book you’re reading, click SHARE and bam, choose where you want to share it. Amazon will include some silly text like “Check out this quote” which I promptly delete because tweets only hold 140 characters.

But that’s not all! Wait, there’s more!

The Kindle (Fire or Phone/Tablet App) promptly links to the book! On some it linked directly to the Look Inside and included the ‘Buy’ link at the top. Others linked directly to the book page. So, if you love something you’re reading and want to share it on social media, it’s gotten much easier!

Here are some pretty screenshots I took on my phone to show you:












This is a great way for readers and authors to promote the stories they’re reading and enjoying. What are you reading? Find your favorite sentence and highlight it, then share it with the (social media) world. And if you enjoy boys kissing boys, zany adventures across the universe, defeating enemies with music, and lots of naughty sex, check out Horatio Slice by the incredibly funny Oleander Plume!

Masturbation Monday: Tease – Part Ten

You have an idea of how much fun it is to read this, but you have no idea how much fun I’ve had causing you to squirm and beg and lust for more about Mack and Piper. I’ve switched back to Piper’s point of view for the finale and I hope you truly enjoy every scintillating sensation.

Madness. Insanity. Crazy.

I was overwhelmed with all three. The way Mack’s tongue tickled along my skin drove me mad. When his teeth bit into my flesh just deep enough to make me wonder if he was a vampire, it drove me insane with need. And when his voice reached through the pleasure and pain of it all, I thought I might be going crazy. Perhaps I had fallen into a coma of pleasure and pain entwined. If so, I never wanted to leave.

Being on the edge, katana sharp, I felt as though I may be spliced in two before Mack let me climax. I didn’t mind, but then again, I did mind. How dare he keep me trussed up like this, unable to touch him, unable to taste him, teasing me into oblivious bliss.

The keening noise I kept hearing, some part of me, knew it was me, begging and pleading for release, to be fucked, to be allowed to reach for that elusive pinnacle of pleasure I needed so badly. His fingers probed my wetness and my muscles clamped down onto them, urging him to keep going, to let me fall. And then they would slip out that hole only to tease my ass cheeks apart, to press and push against my backdoor. I didn’t care where he wanted to stick his fingers, or his tongue, or his cock, as long as he put them all somewhere in me so I could explode and drench him in a tide of sticky juices.

And then I was being shifted again, the ropes pulling this way and that, to his liking. I knew I was replying when he spoke to me, but everything had a dream-like quality to it. His voice rang clear, but mine was fuzzy, like I had one too many tequila shots fuzzy. And then he spanked me.

“C’mon pet, one more time. Come for me.” Click To Tweet

Thrill ran through every nerve-ending, sizzled every synapse. Light exploded behind my half-closed lids and juice ran between my lower lips with every smack. God, I wanted him so much. I couldn’t get enough. Yes, I wanted him to fuck me, but the simple fact that he took the time to turn me into this sensitized submissive over the past few weeks made all the difference.

“You’re leaving quite a puddle on my floor, pet. Remind me to bill you for the cleanup.” Mack’s chuckle rumbled and I swear I felt the vibrations reverberate through me. I was being shifted again, my ass sore and hot from his barehanded whacks. Before I could get my bearings, his lips met mine and we moaned in unison as our tongues twirled and danced.

The ropes on my arms loosened enough that I could wrap them around his shoulders. As soon as I could touch him, I sank my nails into his back muscles. Mack squeezed my ass in his hands and intense sensation rippled through me. When he pulled back from our kiss, his gaze seared my soul. I was his, only his.

We stared into each other’s eyes as his cock pushed into me, the thick head spreading me open for the rest of him. Our gasp as he sank all the way in was one of both relief and need. Just feeling his girth fill me up made it worth the wait. Holding onto each other tight, fingers digging into skin, the weight of the ropes dangling from my limbs, intensified my senses to what I thought was the maximum.

“My beautiful pet.” Mack kissed me again and finally gave me what I wanted. As he moved us, the fire of desire in my belly turned into a supernova. Long strokes followed by short and fast strokes, then back to long strokes, Mack drove me further into madness. “Fuck, you’re so damn wet and hot. I just want to fuck you forever.”

He caressed and soothed me as we caught our breath.

“Sir, please! Can I come?” The whine in my voice bounced off the walls and back into my ears. I’d never sounded so desperate in my life and my life was full of desperate times. I ground my teeth together and clawed into his shoulders again, trying my damnedest to hold back the flood.

“Yeah baby, come for me. I’ll make you explode a few more times, but come for me now.” Mack wrapped one arm tight around my waist and held me close, his other hand clasping the back of my neck. Heat ran from my center to the rest of my body as everything collapsed and then exploded. My ears buzzed and my heart raced as my body collapsed against him.

When I came back to myself, Mack was kissing my nose, my chin, my cheeks. His whispers of praise reached my ears once my hearing returned. I took a huge gulp of air and then he hit my g-spot and my world erupted all over again.

More kisses rained all over my face, Mack’s hold had tightened on me. I was a limp ragdoll in his embrace. I couldn’t hang on to him if my life were in danger. My muscles felt like water. Soreness in my throat told me I’d been screaming as I hit my peak. Mack continued to pump into me, changing his speed and rhythm to whatever suited his needs.

“C’mon pet, one more time. Come for me.” Mack bit my earlobe and swiveled his hips and my body quaked. I bit into his shoulder and he groaned. “Fuck, that’s it for me.” He ground into me, his hold squeezed the air out of my lungs as he let himself go.

Mack leaned against the vehicle in the next slot. My ropes followed. Neither of us spoke right away. He caressed and soothed me as we caught our breath. I clung to him, a little afraid I might fall with how sweaty and sticky we both were, the ropes no longer supported my weight.

I want to lick every inch of you right now.

“Pet. Are you okay?” He whispered in my ear and I squeaked as the heat from his breath hit my skin. My body trembled and another small orgasm fluttered through me.

“Mmhmm.” I nuzzled his neck and when I saw how hard I’d bitten him, a flush filled my face. “Oh hell, I’m sorry, that’s got to hurt.” Reality crashed in and I clung to him.

“I won’t drop you. But I am going to put you on the hood of this car so I can undo your ropes.” The cold hood against my heated skin felt soothing. Mack untied my ankles and rubbed them, then my wrists. “Any numbness? Any pain you aren’t sure about?” Watching him as he massaged my ankles, then my feet, my wrists and then my hands caused tears to prick my eyes.

“I’m perfect, thank you, Sir.” I wanted this with him, all the time. I wanted him to be mine. Did he want me? Did he need me the way I needed him?

Mack kissed me and picked me up. “Fuck it. I’ll clean everything in the morning. Let’s go to bed. I want to lick every inch of you right now.” He carried me up to the apartment on the third floor, laughing as we stumbled a little along the way.

Congratulations! You’ve reached the fantastic finale of Tease! Did you miss something? Want to read it all together? Start from the beginning.

You can find more delicious naughty stories over at Masturbation Monday hosted by the lovely Kayla Lords. If you haven’t submitted your own story as well, and write romance, erotica, or some combination of the genres and sub-genres, please consider doing so.

Link: Masturbation Monday

Link: Kayla Lords

A Penny for Your Thoughts: Bound, Gagged, and Stuffed into a Trunk

Last week, I was invited to Skype into Dr. J.’s writer group. The ferocity of our combined energy caused funnel clouds to appear in my area, but hell, what fun it was!

Last week the talented Dr. J. invited me to Skype into her writers group get together. You have no idea how excited I was to peek into the life of an actual writing group that meets on a regular basis, works together, helps each other, and even teaches each other tips and tricks. I don’t have a local writer group. I’m sure if I looked hard enough I could dig one up, but I’m happy with the way things are right now.

Dr. J. did a presentation on SEO, making writing contacts, #BookMarketingChat, and how all of these things made her a better author and how she gained viewers because of the contacts she made. It was so much fun learning all the various things she involved herself in to make more contacts, get more readers, and how it all measured up.

Andrea Patten did a presentation on blogs – showing different ones in order to give people ideas on how they can customize their own design. During her presentation, she talked about inner critic voices, which made me laugh. It was this that gave me the idea for this post because the thought “I bound, gagged, and stuffed my inner critic into a trunk.” popped into my head.

It reminded me of the Native American story people have passed around the internet since its inception about Two Wolves (and, of course longer verbally). One wolf is darkness, hate, greed, and selfish while the other is light, love, compassion, and giving. The wolf that survives inside you is the one you feed. Which is why I bound, gagged, and stuffed my inner critic into a trunk and locked it away.

Yes, I do occasionally doubt myself and my skills, but my friends remind me of all the good things I’ve done and will do. Their sentiments help me feed my muse. I listen to my muse because she (or occasionally he) has excellent suggestions that make you squirming, begging, readers. And I love it when you beg me for more.

So, remember, my lovelies, feed the good side. Find friends that cause interesting weather patterns because you all get worked up into a frenzy. And remember to laugh because life is too damn short to be miserable.